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Leonie Kellerhof

At more than a few points in this blog I have written about planning: planning for moving abroad, for courses and things I want to see and achieve this year. However, sometimes the best plans do not work out and often being flexible and adaptable is just as important to making studying abroad a success. It is easy to forget that some things are just not predictable, and in my case that was the COVID-19 outbreak in China, which cut my year at Peking University short by almost six months. 

In these circumstances, it is probably needless to say that the past semester has been difficult. When I left my dorm room in Beijing with just a backpack in January to go travelling for three weeks over winter break, I had no idea I would not be coming back. For the first few months after having to leave China, I tried my best to stay optimistic and cling onto the hope that soon I would be able to return to the life (and the plans) I had just begun to build for myself. Unfortunately, as COVID-19 spread across the world this did not come true, and just like most students across the world, I had to complete this semester online from my childhood bedroom, rather than in my host country of choice. 

This semester seemed to be going by painfully slowly at some points, and scarily fast at others and I want to use this blogpost to fill you in with what happened, from the time the COVID-19 pandemic began in China in January to now, six months later.

Travelling in difficult times

In my last post, I mentioned that I would spend my semester break from mid-January to mid-February travelling with friends. We began this trip just like we had planned, and I remember us just briefly noticing when our train from Beijing to Changsha made a stop in Wuhan. At the time, we had heard about a new virus that had broken out on a market there, and we knew that some doctors were comparing it to SARS, but the situation in China seemed normal despite – people got on and off our train and we made it to Changsha without any issues. Living in Hong Kong, I had heard and read a lot about how severely the city had been affected by the SARS outbreak that happened in South China in 2003. Still, I, maybe naively, did not consider that this new virus might become an issue outside of one area in the large country that is China.

We went about our trip relatively unworried for another week before the implications of the virus started manifesting in our lives. While we were visiting Changsha, and later the Zhangjiajie mountains, I brushed off concerned messages from friends and family, reassuring them that where I was, everything seemed normal. However, once we arrived in Chongqing on January 20th, reality slowly started to creep in, as on that day President Xi Jinping acknowledged the virus outbreak in a public speech. Suddenly, most people in the streets were wearing face masks, the Mandarin word for which I will probably never again forget, as it was taught to a friend and me by a drugstore saleswoman, informing us that they had sold out in the entire city within half a day. We eventually managed to buy some at a train station, after being asked to wear them by the police, who were suddenly even more present in the public space than normally. As we continued our trip westwards, to Sichuan province, trains full of masked people started to feel increasingly claustrophobic. Luckily, we had planned to spend the following two days hiking up and staying on Mount Emei, one of the four sacred mountains of Buddhism in China. This allowed us to escape the growing number of restrictions for a little longer, as the rural mountain area was less affected by them at that point. 

However, after over eight hours spent waking, climbing and sliding, the staff of our hotel informed us that on the following day, we would be some of the last people allowed on the peak. The lockdown measures had caught up with us: from the next day on, buses only went down the mountain and major tourist attractions were closed down. The Chinese New Year was approaching quickly – a season that year by year constitutes the largest human migration in the world, with passenger numbers reaching up to three billion. As we returned to the city of Chengdu from Mount Emei, it became clear that preventing this mass movement from spreading the virus was becoming a top priority. Not only had the sights we planned to visit closed, but long-distance connection such as busses were cancelled, and even our hostel informed us they were shutting down. Once we had found new accommodation, we spent a day wandering around the city, the streets of which, despite a population of 16 million, were almost entirely empty, and eerily quiet. At every metro station, our hostel’s reception and even at the door of one of the few restaurants left open, we had to have our temperature checked as a condition for entry. That night, our programme coordinator from Peking University informed us that the spring semester would be postponed until the situation had cleared. Many neighbouring countries and regions also imposed travel bans to people coming from China, which unfortunately (but understandably) included Taiwan, where I had been planning to fly to next. With all of this in mind, I made the difficult decision fly home to Germany for the time being.

In the following weeks, while observing the development of the virus outbreak from home, the uncertainties that people in China and especially in affected areas were experiencing seemed unimaginable to me. Diseases in general, and virus outbreaks especially, inherently alienate and are often cause to a lot of fear. However, thanks to the internet and social media, we were and still are able to see the development in affected regions not only through official postings but also through the eyes of local people. I have been very grateful for this throughout this entire semester, as I believe it serves as a reminder of the human experience underlying every crisis, something that even with extensive reporting by news outlets is easily lost sight of. 

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Leonie Kellerhof

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Leonie Kellerhof

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Leonie Kellerhof

New friends and early goodbyes

Leaving China under these circumstances was heart-breaking for many reasons, even though I knew it would be irresponsible to continue travelling during a public health emergency like this: I did not want to put myself at risk, and of course I wanted to respect the country’s efforts at containing the virus outbreak. Still, leaving in the middle of my trip, and my year abroad, not knowing if and when I could return, was hard to process, and it became even harder once it was clear that I would not be able to go back at all. When I left Beijing a few weeks prior, this was the last thing I had imagined happening. However, one of the saddest parts was saying such an early goodbye to the friends I made this semester. Our class cohort is very diverse, and I was really looking forward to spending another semester in Beijing with friends from all over the world. As most of us have returned to our home countries, we are not only missing out on time spent and experiences shared abroad together, but also on having a support network of people going through the same uncertainties that this virus outbreak has brought. We will hopefully have another year in London together, but this time is lost still. 

At the same time, this unexpected situation has made me all the more grateful for the experiences of this first semester spent in Beijing. I am surprised by how at home I already felt in China after six months, despite the language barrier that I still struggled with. I hope that I will be able to return to Beijing one day in the future and catch up on some of the many things I had still hoped and planned to do there. 

Abroad at home and at home abroad

As it became clear that the lockdown restrictions would not be eased in China anytime soon, Peking University decided to start the semester online in mid-February. A few weeks later, this became almost the norm for all students across the world, but back in those first few weeks, us students at Chinese universities were alone in front of our laptops, trying to adapt to a new way of learning. 

While being an online student so unexpectedly and in such uncertain times was more than challenging, it has also been an experience I have learned to cherish among everything that has happened. As I have mentioned on this blog before, I am a big enthusiast of anything technology, internet or digital media related, and therefore seeing and experiencing how education and work were suddenly moving to the online sphere was more than interesting to me. As my friends, classmates, and me were forced to stay outside of our country of choice for the entire semester, online classes and other forms of media allowed us to continue our education, stay updated with the situation in China, exchange and study together, or even just catch up, chat and share our sadness about the situation we were all in, despite being all over the world. Spending hours and hours every day alone in front a computer doing classwork, writing a thesis and reading the news, instead of studying together with friends on campus and exploring the city was very lonely and even frustrating at times, so I found myself looking forward to online classes and video calls. They provided a structure in our lives that had been turned upside down and some comfort while dealing with new uncertainties and the spread of COVID-19. In a way, being online students provided us with a window, even if a small one, into the lives we had built abroad, while experiencing global changes at home.

How to go on?

I’m sure many of you have experienced or are experiencing similar feelings and issues in the past six months and now. How the coming year will look is still very unclear, whether it is related to studying or daily life in general. While I tentatively return to hoping and planning for another year abroad, in London this time, I would love to chat to anyone that has concerns or questions regarding their study plans or my experience in China. 

In the meantime, I hope you are all staying safe and taking care of yourselves and I hope better times are ahead!

June 2020 | Leonie Kellerhof